Processing

"You're already right where you need to be." - S. Hagen

For whatever reason, this quote has been rattling around my brain, and has shown up lately on other blogs I read. It's interesting, because after my job rejection, my reaction has been, "what's wrong with me? - what do I need to change to become right, to become enough...?" Job rejections are funny things. The whole job search process can be depressing, dehumanizing, demoralizing. You put your soul out there, and when you're rejected, you don't really know why. Was someone that much better, or did you do something to screw it up? Did you just not "fit," whatever that really means.

So, I'm back to looking at where I am now, and where I would like to be. I'm processing through the disappointment of rejection. I'm processing through the possibilities open to me right now, right here, in this place. I have loose ends here, projects that are tied to this place. Maybe we're not done with each other yet. Maybe, for now, I am where I need to be.

Rejections

The picture is from the Moss Mansion in Billings, April 6th (unfortunately not here!)

You can't win if you don't play, but playing and being rejected kind of sucks. I've been struggling with the job search, and the weather (predicted chances of snow for the next week makes it seem like spring will never arrive). I have to just keep going, and trust that what happens is what is supposed to happen. Or maybe just accept that what happens has happened and is now over. Move on. Keep moving on. And eventually something will develop on the job front. Or the school front. Or some front somewhere.

I don't like uncertainty, but I have gotten a lot of practice with living with uncertainty the past few years. I can still say, whatever happens, that I have learned a lot about myself, and I am stronger. I don't like rejections, either, but I've gotten rather good at dealing with them. And so it goes. Life. Still better than the alternative.

I think I've been here before...

So, gave my verbal notice Monday that June 30th will be my last day. I have known this in my head for some time, but wanted it to be made real. I also wanted to shut the door firmly on the possibility of staying. I'd found myself thinking, well, if nothing else comes up, I could always stay a little longer. No, staying longer is not an option. I fit into this work environment like someone slamming an octagonal peg into a circular space with a sledge hammer. Not well at all. The fit is not there, and it's wearing on me.

I'm happy to have everything out in the open, and am working on my future plans. I can't really share them here yet, but hopefully will be able to do that soon. Meanwhile, I am trying to get things organized at work so I can finish all the things I need to in the next 3 1/2 months. I'm getting ready to present at a conference in April. Life will be interesting. I'm curious to see what new adventures it will bring.

Where?

So, since I feel like I've got a pretty good idea of what I want to focus on career-wise, I decided I would try to figure out WHERE I want to be. I'll be moving this summer, but to where?

Instead of resolutions, I decided to create a list of requirements for the place I'll be living. I broke them down into geography and work environment.

Geography

• Mid-sized city (60,000 - 500,000-ish), or a large city that has distinct neighborhood areas
• Moving water (river, creek, whatever - if it's wet and moving, that's good)
• Cultural opportunities - access to museums (natural history, historical, art, etc), zoos, arboretums
• Nature access - green space, hiking/walking trails, nearby nature areas (state or national parks, national forest land, etc)
• Public transportation - bus system, light rail?, car sharing?, bike trails?
• Airport - if not in town, then nearby
• University - large enough for research opportunities

Bonus: in a valley with hills or mountains around; within 12-16 hours of Omaha; variety of housing (affordable); space for a garden

Work Environment

• Less hierarchical structure - more flattened, team-based, collaborative
• Work expectations established (things not run on favoritism, nepotism, or any other ism; things not changing constantly)
• Stable (or relatively stable) budget, with money dedicated for professional development
• Transparency (especially with the budget)
• Co-workers who meet standards for competence
• Co-workers with skills/experience/knowledge they are willing to share (mentors)
• Professionalism, organization, flexibility, respect

Bonus: co-workers I like and respect; stable, upbeat environment; people who are curious and continue to learn; learning and professional development are valued (especially in terms of time and money)

Catching Up

Oh poor neglected blog. Oddly enough, my problem has been that I have had too much to say, so I haven't been saying anything. Much of what I could have said would have been tentative. Things have felt very tentative in my life for awhile. I have been seriously considering my life and my plans for the future.

I have also been following the "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything" philosophy. I have been trying not to be negative about my work situation. While I love my job duties themselves, the work atmosphere is still full of all kinds of crazy. I have been trying to step away and not get pulled into the downward spiral.

My birthday present from Nancy - a shoebox full of freshly dug potatoes and carrots!

So, life goes on. I spent my birthday weekend in Missoula. It was a wonderful weekend. Not only did I get to see friends, but I felt like I could actually be me, and talk, and be listened to. I've missed that so much. During my birthday weekend, I did a phone interview for a job in the midwest. While the people seemed nice enough, I turned down the chance to interview for the job. Once I realized that I was falling into the - this could be my only chance to escape - mode, and started to listen to my instincts, I realized that the job seemed like an okay thing, but not something that made me excited, not something I really WANTED. I don't want a job that's okay. I want a job that's great. And this job made me question some of the people dynamics - it showed signs of having it's own kinds of crazy. Turning down the interview made me feel both sad and strong. But ultimately, I deserve a great job, and since I am employed now, I am going to hold out for one.

This means that my previous post about leaving was premature. In soul searching, I realized that I really like the library field. I really like my current job duties. If I could pick up my job and plunk it down elsewhere, I would be dancing in the streets - everyday - on my way to work. Which means that I am still looking for other jobs, but that I am holding out for a library job. A great library job.

Meanwhile, I am moving from my apartment to a little house (see photo above). It's the top part of a little house, actually. Someone I work with owns it, and it is finally getting hooked up to water/sewer lines so she can rent it out. Since I will move in with the funky carpeted kitchen and old appliances and little gas heater, she will make it cheap. Eventually, much work will be done, but for now, cheap and small works for me, and that makes funky okay. And it's much better insulated and has storm windows, which going into winter here is a very good thing. I'll be out of this apartment by November 10th, so much cleaning and packing will be ensuing.

I am going to be doing a few fun things. I'm going to the Bannack ghost tour this Friday night after work. Saturday I'm helping make teacup cupcakes for a Sunday birthday party. As part of this, I've been experimenting with putting food color into sugar cookies. If you use the paste stuff, it works. I'm invited to the birthday party, too. Next Saturday after work I'm doing the Butte ghost tour. I guess if I get too scared and can't sleep, I can always pack or clean. (Callie says, "moving? again?")

November 1st starts National Novel Writing Month. I'm going to be working on the novel I started last year. I haven't done much with it since that point, and I ended up cutting at least half of what I wrote. I just won't count what I've already done (and kept). Let the insanity begin!

An Open Letter to the Universe

Dear Universe,

Thank you for presenting me with this lesson again, and for all the similar lessons you've presented me with in the past. Thanks for the wisdom to recognize the patterns, and the hooks to my behavior. It only took 5 weeks this time, instead of 5 years, or 18 years, or whatever large block of time this could have taken from my life.

I've been struggling with what I thought were two things - whether to leave, or whether to stand up for myself. I see now that I need to do both. I refuse to work in an environment where bullying is running rampant. I accept that I need to stand up to this. I also accept that standing up to it will not stop it; the bully is in charge and has no desire/reason to change. I need to take care of myself, and speak the truth. I accept that I deserve to work in a place that better matches my values, beliefs, and working habits.

What this means is that I am actively seeking other employment, and that when I resign, I will not use euphimisms or make up excuses for why I'm leaving. I will write a letter that will go to the director, and also the Library Board, Friends of the Library, Union Representatives, and the county. I will not slink off into the sunset. To protect myself, I will have a job lined up before I resign.

So, dear universe, what I would like from you is a job in a library, one where cooperation, transparency, collegiality, and reasonableness reign supreme. I can see the exit sign now. Please help me find my new entrance.

Yours truly,
XXOOOO

Employed at last, employed at last...

Okay, as promised, the scoop on the interview. I interviewed Monday afternoon last week. The interview was based on two scenarios, and involved a kind of simulated case study approach. They were scored, with the highest scoring person offered the job. The job was offered to the other person, who turned it down. I was offered the job Tuesday morning. Our scores differed by about 6 points, so it was close. I am naturally delighted to have a job, and hope the other candidate is successful in her search.

I left for Missoula on Monday evening after the interview, spent a few days in Missoula with friends, came over early on Friday to check out some apartments and turn in my application. I flew home, enjoyed the holiday with my family, including my Texas sister and nieces.

This afternoon I found out that I was approved for the apartment I liked. So... in a week I have a job and a place to live! Woo hoo! After being unemployed for 6 months, the mad scramble now begins to find money for all of this. I'm hiring myself out for odd jobs.

The list of completed and upcoming jobs -

• cleaning and reorganization of two different purses
• baking 12 dozen cookies and 4 loaves of non-yeast bread, and cooking & freezing a caserole to feed 24
• cleaning & reorganizing a basement
• weeding

My catch phrase is No Job Too Odd. So, if any of you have any need for odd jobs in the next 2 weeks, let me know. As long as it's legal, I'm not ruling anything out.

I am really excited about the job itself, and the temporary inconvenience of having to scrape together moving money is just that - temporary. I'm thinking that I may be doing some pretty rustic living at first, but having done that more than once in the last couple years... well, it's not pretty, but it works, and it doesn't last forever (thank goodness!) Thanks to all of you who are now and have been my supporters in the past. Without you, I would not have made it through grad school, and wouldn't be soon to start my first professional position. You know who you are, and I will be forever grateful.

The winner is...

something that will look completely unfamiliar.After getting feedback, and some kind of leaning toward 1 or 2, but with no real consensus, I took some advice from Bonnie. She suggested that feeling comfortable and well dressed might be worth splurging on something. I think the reason I needed voting in the first place was that none of the other options felt right for an interview.

So, my niece went with me and was my fashion consultant (she is available for hire if you happen to be in the Omaha area). The jacket fits well (better than the other options). It's open here so you can see the blouse. Some of you thought I should stick with the traditional collared blouse. After trying on a bunch that just didn't fit right, I remembered why the number of traditional blouses/shirts I've owned in my adulthood could be counted on both hands. There's no way I would have been comfortable wearing one to an interview.

Now all I need to do is finish my presentations and handouts. My interview is changed to Monday, 2-4pm mountain time, so well wishes and thoughts sent my way at that time are much appreciated. This means that I will have an extra day in Missoula, too. Woo hoo! I'll keep you all posted on the results. Thanks for all your comments and thoughts.

(Callie, as always, looks fantastic.)

Heart

Thanks for all the words of encouragment on the job hunting process. I'm having to remember that it is a PROCESS, and that my whole point in going to library school was to try to get closer to having a job that I love, one which fits my values, talents, personality, and skills. I also have to remember not to take rejection personally - another thing that's easier to do intellectually.

After reflecting on the rejection from Alaska a bit, I realized that it was not a position that fit me well. It consisted of a lot of group instruction, which is not my favorite part of the academic library set of skills. I got some really valuable feedback from one of the steering committee members, and I think it will help me focus in on what I enjoy and what fits my talents and personality better.

And of course, me being me, I defaulted to one of my favorite defense mechanisms - some black and white thinking; if I couldn't get one job, that meant I would never get any jobs, and not being comfortable with group instruction meant I should not even look for library jobs. Hey, I don't claim that it makes sense. It comes from the emotional side, and is one of the grooves worn into my brain that gives me lots of excuses not to do things. Fortunately, I've reached the point in my life where I don't have to go too far down this path before I see that I've been here oh, so many times before, and that it's not a place I want to go. Some course correction, and I'm back to being more realistic, and optimistic, about the job process.

I'm keeping my options open, and exploring related fields, like instructional design. I'm also looking at reference/instruction positions where the instruction is more virtual. I do truly think that library instruction needs to move in different directions, away from stand alone instruction. Some libraries are getting that. My hope is that I may be able to find a place open to changes, where I can put my skills, talents, and interests to use.

And it's not terribly surprising that my momentum in this process is more like a spiral than a straight line. My whole life has been a series of spirals - starting down a path, figuring out that's not quite where I need to be, spiraling around to another place. It looks very messy and doesn't work well for most people (and ends up taking longer and costing more), but for better or worse, it's been my way. This is just another curve in the spiral. I'm really excited to turn the corner and see what's ahead.

Maybe that's why I like labyrinths... the curves, the back and forth, making progress while looking like you're not, and requiring patience and time. It could be a metaphor for my life, really. I'm not sure exactly where this job hunting process will take me. All I know is that it feels very, very good to be listening to my heart again, and to be keeping myself open to the journey.

Hope

Desert Dome, Henry Doorly Zoo, Omaha
Wallabies (?)

Boomslang (think Harry Potter)

This guy came over to get some water while another critter was over there, and then started doing this - I don't think he was happy...

Isn't s/he pretty?

It's been very interesting in my brain lately. With the inaguration and with things actually happening the first few days in office, I have hope for the future of my country for the first time in a long, long time. The transparency of this administration alone is exciting and amazing (and if you haven't looked at the new whitehouse.org pages... I suggest a visit).

On the other hand, my own personal store of hope for myself is kind of on a downhill slide. It's all part of the job seeking process - the ups and downs. I know this intellectually, but the job seeking process isn't a completely intellectual process. It's hard to keep your heart out of it. I'm continuing to slog through the job applications, but I have to admit to not having my whole heart into it at the moment. I know that eventually I'll reach the uphill side of this. For now, I may not be posting a lot about anything job related, kind of in the spirit of - "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything."

I did spend a lovely afternoon yesterday enjoying the unseasonally warm weather at the zoo. It's been a long time since I've been to the zoo in Omaha. They've expanded quite a bit. They have all these habitat type areas - a desert dome, a jungle, a butterfly habitat. The butterfly habitat was amazing. It's got the double door entry and exit, and then once you're inside, the butterflies are flying all around. You have to watch out for them (and check for them on you when you're leaving). I fell in love with the owl butterfly. Unfortunately, my camera battery decided to die, so I have no photos to share. All my images are in my head. Maybe they'll help shift things to hopeful.

Job and Life Update

Since I've had so many emails checking on my employment status, I thought I'd do a general update. I haven't heard anything from Alaska one way or the other. It's been about a month since my interview, though. I think the more time that passes, the less likely there will be a job offer. That's my operating assumption, anyway, so I have applied for a bunch more jobs.

I am using the following quote as my mantra these days.
“When one door closes, another opens."
(attibuted to both Alexander Graham Bell and Helen Keller)

I'm hopeful that the right job for me will come along. Meanwhile, I've been creating a website with my professional portfolio, experimenting with podcasting software of various kinds, reading library-related articles, rereading the Harry Potter books, and knitting a sock. I don't know if I have time to be employed (just kidding!).

I will most likely be registering for my first professional conference, too. The early registration deadline for the Association of College and Research Libraries (ACRL) conference is Friday. It's in Seattle in March. I was kind of holding off in case I was employed by then, but I think it would be a great experience. The presentations sound very interesting, and I could learn so much. Putting my life on hold while waiting for possible job offers is a bit like waiting for a guy to call. Maybe it will happen, but it's best not to hold your breath

Out with the old...

and waiting to find out about the new. Callie and I wrapped up our Bloomington adventures. We spent a few peaceful nights at the Motel 6, reading and watching many back-to-back episodes of Mythbusters.
It's odd to know that I won't be spending all my time divided between the Wells Library (home of SLIS and pictured above), Ballantine Hall, and the Education Library.

It's time to move on, though. This photo is of my empty key chains (and my temporary motel keys). I'm looking at this as another opportunity to learn to let go of the things we use to fill our lives. I'm keyless for now, but eventually other opportunities (and the keys that go with them) will present themselves. I'll just have to be patient, and enjoy the journey that takes me to those places, keys, etc.

These are the temporary dwellings of Trish and Callie. We're staying at my brother's house, in the attic-y extra bedroom. We've made ourselves comfy for now. I'll be able to spend some time with my family, do some sightseeing around the area, and get myself organized for whatever the future holds in store for Callie and me.

As you can see, Callie has made herself comfy. She's still a little perturbed by the moving experience, but she's getting settled in a bit. It will be nice to look forward to finding a job and a permanent place in the future, though. We're both tired of moving, and want to find a place to stay for a nice, long time.

I'll keep you posted on what happens with Alaska. I haven't heard anything yet, but am hoping to hear one way or the other very soon. Naturally, I hope to hear that they want me; it's a very nice library, and the people were extremely nice. The job itself combines all the different things that interest me, and I think I would be able to both contribute, and continue to learn and grow. It's out of my hands, though. I appreciate all of your good thoughts sent my way. Hopefully they'll help. Either way, I'll keep you all updated.

She's back....

and I have survived my first professional library interview. I like Anchorage, I like the library, and I like the library staff very much. I think it would be challenging in a good way, that I would be able to learn and grow professionally, and that I would be able to make a contribution and use my powers for good. Plus, I could see myself living there; I really want a place in which I could settle down, not just a place to work for a couple years to get experience.

At this point, it is out of my hands, though. I should know something one way or the other by January at the latest. Let the adventures continue; the next great adventure is packing up my life in Bloomington and doing something with all the stuff (anyone need any random stuff?).

I put pictures up online. I didn't get as many pictures as I'd hoped; it was pretty foggy for most of Sunday. These are the links to all the photos I have, though. The first is for the library. The second is for Anchorage.

http://picasaweb.google.com/magpiemt/ConsortiumLibrary?authkey=swZ_LAFA6MQ#

http://picasaweb.google.com/magpiemt/Anchorage?authkey=kX4ZhklKT1E#

For a preview of what you'll see, here are a couple photos.

This one is from the coastal trail that's accessed from downtown. You can see the hoarfrost on the trees and the Cook Inlet to the right.
This is when the sun came out through the fog. It's taken downtown (yes, it is a city), and if you look down the street, you can see mountains in the distance.

And the countdown continues

for those keeping score. Tomorrow is my last SLIS class. (woo hoo!) My final paper is done and printed (check). My two hour class discussion facilitation is as done as it's getting, with an outline and source list typed up to turn in (check).

I have my plane ticket, reservation from Bloomington to Indianapolis with the shuttle people, my interview suit, and the designated 2 oz containers so I don't have to check my bag. I have thank you cards for the search committee (and some extras). I have tons of questions - to both ask and that might be asked. (check, check, check, etc, you get the idea)

So what is missing? That would be the completely finished presentation, along with handout. I'm working on it, and will undoubtedly be working on it tomorrow. And because I'll probably still be working on it until Sunday night, I will have to take heavy laptop with me. *sigh*

On the bright side, in roughly 4 days time, it will be Monday morning and I will be in Alaska finishing up the presentation, for better or worse. As I've said (447 times before), it will be good practice and a good experience if nothing else. I think really meaning this (as opposed to saying it and hoping to believe it) shifts some of my stress. I know I can tend to get caught up in the feeling that one experience (a job interview) carries all these HUGE consequences for the rest of my life. Yes, I think I might like this job, but it is ONE job in the grand scheme of life; if it doesn't happen, well, that opens doors to other opportunities. I'm repeating this to myself so I can shift the, oh, 10-20 percent of my brain that doesn't believe it yet.

When I get back to Bloomington on Tuesday, I will have one Education Library shift to finish, a few weeks of work in the cube, and then Bloomington and I will be finished with each other. I'm a little sad about that; having an apartment that I like has really changed how I feel about the town.

I will keep everyone posted about the job search happenings, and will post pictures and thoughts about the trip once I get back. Now, back to my presentation... after a break to look at an adorable photo of Callie sleeping on a yarn ball... (try that for added degree of difficulty while knitting!

Thanksgiving, Mad Cats, and Job Updates

I had a very pleasant Thanksgiving with my family. I also got to go to two birthday parties, and paint my sister's kitchen. I had the second phone interview for the Alaska job.

I've been invited for a personal interview; I'm one of three finalists for the job, so I'll be flying to Anchorage the 13th, having the interview the 15th, and flying back the 16th. I will have Sunday to do some exploring, and to get used to the 4 hour time difference. The interview process is an all day affair that starts about 7:45am and ends about 8:30pm. As with the rest of this application process, it will be a good experience and good practice, even if nothing else happens. I'm extremely happy to have made it through all the cuts to being one of three. (and yes, I am taking my camera, and yes, I will be taking as many photos as possible).

There are two weeks left of school. The following week is the interview at the beginning of the week and graduation at the end. I'm guessing the rest of the month will consist of hectic packing and figuring out what to do with things.

Callie is glad I'm back, but I'm thinking she's not going to be quite so happy when I leave again in a couple weeks.... (we're not even going to talk about boxes and what will happen with packing.)

Decisions

Okay, those of you who have talked to me lately have seen me at my crazy and indecisive best, even for a Libra. Depending on the day you talked to me, I might have been postponing graduation for a semester, possibly applying to PhD programs and any other sort of postponement of life after SLIS.

The whole job search thing is such a roller coaster ride. Woo hoo, we're up! Oh, now we're down. They called, they haven't called. I was an idiot during my interview. I wasn't that bad. Repeat. (and repeat, and repeat again.)

I don't like the not knowing that comes with change. It was feeling safer to stay for another semester, just to know what was happening in the future. I think life has a way of figuring out when you're avoiding, though. I had two things happen this weekend that have helped push me away from my indecisiveness.

One, I had an email from Alaska, and I'm still a candidate (their term - "one of the finalists"). I have another phone interview to look forward to surviving. What I want to know is if I get a sash for being a finalist (I've been practicing my wave).

Two, I have someone to take over the lease of my apartment. This means I will need to go somewhere at the end of December, so I can't keep doing this wishy washy, I want it all kind of thing. I want to be in school and out of school. I want to stay here and I want to leave. I want to move and not move. Straddling all those fences was making me cranky, if nothing else.

It's kind of funny. I was just talking about this on Saturday at work. I left thinking, I really can't keep trying to stand in all the squares at the same time. It's one thing to stay with the feeling of being uncomfortable while you consider options. It's another to know what you need to do, but let fear make you crazy. Deciding to decide, deciding to do what I needed to do even though I was afraid, opened things up that had seemed stuck. Weird that that's when I suddenly got emails.... hmm, some of you would say that it's not a coincidence.

So, apparently, I will be graduating in December, according to plan. I may or may not be employed. Believe me, I will keep everyone posted on how the job search goes. And if you find me sleeping on your porch in January, well, just look at it as having your own live-in librarian.... In the meantime, pass me some boxes. Looks like I'm packing for the eleventeenth time.

Job Updates and Other Random Babbling

Apparently, I was not a complete dork in my phone interview with Alaska. They contacted me yesterday for permission to check references, the next step in the process. I've made it through several weeding out points - the application stage and the phone interview stage If I make it through the reference checking stage, I could be invited to come to Anchorage for a series of interviews. Yikes! Since my references all know about the job, it's still out of my hands at this point. All I can do is wait. They'd like to have someone in Alaska for interviews the week after Thanksgiving, though, so it doesn't sound like I'll have to wait too long for some sort of an answer. I'm holding to my original thought, which is that every stage I get to is another learning experience that will help me in the future. The other jobs I've applied for will be closing at various points during this month; until then, there's nothing I can do about them, either.

Meanwhile, we've got assignments due in cataloging every week from this week through the end of the semester. Our final project is both a cumulation of the assignments we've been working on, and the addition of new material. The first kids' lit seminar assignment is due Friday - an annotated bibliography of war stories for teen girls. If anyone's interested in reading war stories teen girls might like, let me know. I've found some interesting ones, including a novel based on the life of a woman who fought in the Civil War while dressed as a boy. We still have a paper, and then leading a two hour group discussion due in that class. Enough to keep me busy.

As promised, here's a picture of the mailing we finished at work - all 1533 ballot packets packed in boxes before going down to the mailroom.

So, while we were very glad to see them go, the guy in the mailroom was (understandably) not so happy. I think we owe him cookies, or maybe tequila...

Ah, to add to my insanity, I've also signed up for National Novel Writing Month, for the third year in a row. I have yet to actually finish, but one of these years.... who knows? It could be this one.

Maybe it is fall, and more random bits

The weather feels like it. The 80s are gone. I know some of you don't get my facination with cooler weather, but hot is not my friend. The only thing I suppose I should do before it gets cold (or as cold as it gets here), is find a new winter coat. I'm sort of putting it off, since I'm not at all sure where I will be wintering. That makes a big difference in the type of coat I'd want.

I did finally post my apartment on the graduate student housing board. (and made a quick webpage using only Notepad - it's pretty basic, but it does have more pics of the apartment: http://ella.slis.indiana.edu/~plpierso/apartmentinfo.html). I've been putting that off, too. I'm ready to be finished with school and Bloomington in some ways. In other ways, I really like the apartment, and Callie and I are really nicely settled in and cozy here, and I've been getting together with some people for knitting evenings. The thought of having to move me, Callie, and my stuff off to some mysterious place, and to have to get to know where things are all over sometimes seems like more work than I feel I can manage.

I'm ready to go to a place and stick around there for awhile, settle in and feel connected and comfortable. I do like the fun of exploring new places, but I'm ready to stay in a place. That makes me want to be all the more sure about picking a place I like. I had the thought that I could just get experience for a couple years and then move on. Now, I think I would like to stay somewhere at least 5 years, if not longer. Is it too much to hope that the perfect job is my first job in the profession? It would be wonderful if that was the case, that I could find a job where my skills could be used, and used well.

It's all wait and see for now. I am getting myself ready for my phone interview. I'm going over questions that might be asked, and preparing myself for the answers I might give. It's mainly a matter of reminding myself what I think about my skills, experiences, ways of working. I take all of that for granted, or sometimes don't value myself enough. I'm excited and nervous, but if nothing else, it will be good practice. I appreciate the opportunity to do some self-reflection, and to look back over what I've learned over the past two years. Even though I feel like I know only a miniscule amount of what I'd like to know, I have learned quite a bit, a suprising amount.

Random Stuff

My project at work is helping make photocopies of the nomination materials to go out to the faculty. Lots of copies - like 19,929 of them. I will be working tomorrow and on Friday afternoon, and maybe over the weekend. Hopefully this will be remembered when I take off the Tuesday before Thanksgiving...

Brenda sent me a birthday present, which I got today. A calendar of treehouses around the world. Someday when I become a clairvoyant pirate/writer/hermit, I will live in a treehouse instead of a cave.

Indiana has early voting (?? - I don't know), so since I'm registered to vote here, I will be voting tomorrow. I am trying to have good thought about the election. I have also made sure my passport is still current (good until Dec 2010, just in case).

I have a phone interview scheduled next week for the Alaska job. I'm alternating between excitement and nervousness (as in a lot of random smiling for no reason, followed by feelings of dread and nausea). If nothing else, at least some response has happened to one of my applications, so I take this as a sign that at least on paper I'm not a dork (no guarantees about in person ;-)

I am baffled by the Dewey Decimal system of classification, and can only hope that the mysteries become clearer before my assignment is due.

If I had roughly 17 years with nothing scheduled, I MIGHT be able to catch up on all the things I would like to do.

It's still not fall here. It's been in the 70s and 80s. boo.